THE MUSHROOM SOCIETY

OFFICIAL CHARTER OF: “THE MUSHROOM SOCIETY”

The Mushroom Society was founded on December the eighth 2015 by a group of men who found that they had a common bond. This bond was that they were blissfully unaware of upcoming events until being given the most rudimentary of facts by their spouses, usually at the very last minute. These facts were always disclosed with the accusation that the men had not listened when told of the upcoming event. Wives are automatically barred from being members because they know everything and have all the answers.

The men banded together to form The Mushroom Society. The Society is to be organized into chapters called “Mushroom Cave Planting Plots”. These chapters may be called Plots in the interest of simplification. The original, and so far only, Plot will be known as Plot #1. As other Plots join they will be named chronologically as Plot #2, Plot #3, etc.

The Motto of the Mushroom Society is taken from the handbook used by all mushroom farmers. To whit: “KEEP THEM IN THE DARK AND FEED THEM BULLSHIT”.

All applicants must meet certain criteria.
   #1. They must never know where they are supposed to be in any and all functions involving their wives.
   #2. They must never know where the function will be held.
   #3. They must never know at what time the function will be held.
   #4. They must never know what the function is about
There are other criteria they must not know but as all applicants are totally clueless they will surely meet these criteria.

After repeatedly proving themselves by answering all questions with “I don’t know” they will be considered by the officers of their prospective Plot for membership. Since these officers know nothing about anything no applicant has ever been denied membership.

The Officers shall be titled using the names of mushrooms thusly:

              The Big Shitake; or Great and Mighty leader of all
              Augustus; the Prince
              Amanita; the Death Cap
              Bovita; the Puff ball
              Grampus; the Pigs ear
              Hydnum; the Belly-button

All new members will be known as button mushrooms until proving themselves worthy of moving up the mushroom ranks. This can only be accomplished by them being totally in the dark and unknowing of any answers for an extended period of time.

The founding Mushrooms of Plot#1 and their titles are:

              Tony Andreas The Big Shitake
              Bruce Taber The Augustus
              Nick K ougias The Amanita
              Jeremy Tidd The Grampus
              Chris Martin The Hydnum
              Bill Martin The Bovista

Written and attested to by Tony Andreas, The Big Shitake on this date 7/18/2019